Those Darn Emotional Needs! | PurReflections

In past articles, and our interview with Patrick Wanis, we?ve talked about how easily people can be swayed by charismatic individuals. All the intellect and education in the world doesn?t necessarily prevent you from falling prey to someone who targets you at an emotional level.

With the release of the new book on James Ray; Book Review: Tragedy in Sedona by Connie Joy we learn that even before Sedona, another woman died in one of Ray?s events. The review gives an overview of how that tragedy happened and some of the reasons it was suppressed.

The more we can learn about how our emotions have such sway over our life choices, the better choices we can ultimately make.

The 6 Emotional Needs
1) Love and Connection: Love comes in many forms, romantic, brotherly, sisterly, and the basic ability to connect with another human being. It also includes connection to a wider community- this is critical because it creates a sense of belonging. Often we choose to go to a retreat or workshop so that we can be with ?like minded people,? a place that makes us feel emotionally secure.

2) Security: Has many forms; mental, emotional physical, financial, and spiritual. If we don?t have a place to live, we aren?t physically secure. There is security that we find in relationships ? mental and emotional support ? when we have someone to turn to when we are feeling weak. Security can also mean a job and money.

3) Challenge: We actually like to be challenged- setting a goal, and then planning out how we can achieve it.

4) Significance: Significance, or the question of ?Do I feel significant? Do I feel important, do other people need me?? typically leads to individuals become part of a group, church, temple or cult (just a few examples) to feel significant and connected to community. Volunteering is a way many people fill their need to feel significant.

5) Meaning & Purpose: Finding our meaning and purpose can often be a lifetime journey. We may ask ourselves questions such as; ?Am I living my passion, does my life have meaning??

6) Personal Growth: Women, even more than men, have a higher sense of the need for growth than men do. Women like to change their hair, clothes, and accessories and tend to embrace change. Male energy is direct while female energy is more nurturing. Women tend to focus on creativity, self-improvement and evolving more than men do.

If one (or more) of these needs are not being fulfilled, we can find ourselves easily swayed by individuals who say they will provide the solution for us. James Ray, and now others, promise to fill those needs for us in various forms;
? come join us and like-minded people (#1)
? let us help you regain your original DNA blueprint (#6)
? let us show you how to increase your wealth (#2)
? we will push you to become your personal best (#3)
? you?ll be part of the most significant world change in 2000 years (#4)
? acquire a new skill to transform yourself and those you love (#5)

Take a Look at Yourself Today
Does one emotional need resonate with you more than another? If so, which one? Write it down and start brainstorming what would make you feel more ?full? and less ?empty.? Once you identify what you think is missing, begin charting a focused course to fill it.

Many people are experiencing lack of security today. They have been downsized and their daily lives and homes are in jeopardy. The riots in London the last few days were a shock and perhaps a wake up call of how desperate people are feeling. Individuals know they need a job to replace their previous one but may not understand that the sense of desperation, and/or fear, they feel is directly related to the emotional need for security in their lives. Feeling like you are being tossed about in a storm can become debilitating, and potentially lead to bouts of anger and depression.

It?s OK to feel angry, sad and depressed. Recognize the reactions for what they are. Physical/chemical reactions to unfulfilled emotional needs. Let yourself feel the emotion. Suppressing it/them just makes it even harder to deal with down the road. Find a friend or family member, or in serious cases a medical professional, to help you walk through the pain and sadness until you get through it. Once you make it through an empty area, you can evaluate if there are other weak links in your emotional armor.

If you are looking for love, you won?t find it by staying home each night watching television (trust me I know!) It?s hard to force yourself to go out and meet people but being isolated (or feeling that you can?t go because you don?t have money) are just excuses that we make up to hide behind. No one wants to be rejected and it?s easier to be a wallflower and not venture out then it is to embrace life some days. Acknowledge that you are hiding and make a plan to do something. Go for a walk. Smile at someone. Initiate a conversation. Take baby steps that will build your courage up and you might be surprised; Mr. or Miss ?Right? might be just around the corner!

Don?t Carry the Weight of the World on Your Shoulders by Yourself
Today I felt so fortunate. It had been a long stretch between work assignments and my cupboards were more than bare, the mice weren?t even stopping by any longer! But I forced myself to stay in touch with friends and former colleagues, even on days when it seemed like nothing would ever open up. About a month after talking with partners and then finally the owner of a law firm, I was offered an assignment. As most of you know a paycheck doesn?t come up front; you have to wait a few weeks to get in the system. When one of the partners found I was crunched for cash, he offered an additional assignment I could take on in the evenings and he paid part up front so I could cover my bills in the interim.

We may not be able to help everyone but we can take acts of kindness toward another person when the opportunity presents itself. Things like helping a person network themselves back into a job or giving them contact information that will let them start fishing for themselves to get back on the road to being self-sustainable.

Today was a good day for me and I hope that all of you reading are having a good day too. Remember, sometimes you have to make your own magic:

? Be willing to receive if someone offers you a loan or part time work
? Be willing to humble yourself, take lower paid work while job hunting
? Be willing to accept the hug and shoulder to cry on that a friend offers
? Be willing to allow yourself to feel moments of joy and happiness
? Be willing to share laughter and have fun with others even in down times
? Be willing to stop thinking about yourself and reach out to help someone else
? Be willing to allow yourself to feel and deal with the pain of a situation
? Be willing to move on with resolve and determination to reach your goal(s)

Visualize where you want to be, feel the sensation of being in that place and then take the appropriate steps toward making it happen. That is what manifestation is all about. If we keep waiting to get rescued, and don?t take an active part in the rescue, we can miss out on what may turn into a golden opportunity.

Source: http://purqi.wordpress.com/2011/08/08/those-darn-emotional-needs/

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